Routine – Def. a usual series of things that you (should) do at a particular time. Or otherwise known as a seven letter word that makes me run for the hills.
Routines can seem quite rigid and daunting. Although they’re something that we’ve been taught to follow since to follow since preschool, we often perceive them as impossible to implement into our everyday adult lives.
We tend to overthink the routine as a strict actionable plans that we MUST follow, or else we’re lazy, unaccomplished, failures as humans. With so many negative connotations surrounding this idea, it’s easy to see why breaking the routines, we vowed to put in action during a drowsy-induced “I’ve gotta get my shit together” 3 AM stupor, becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
But not for lack of trying.
We head straight for stationary aisle at the store to select a planner with some satisfying, inspirational quote, and think, “Surely this will get my life back on track.” I can’t even count how many notebooks I’ve left uncomplete in my bedside drawerrawling with perfect manuscript from cover the cover, reading “Today’s a new beginning” or some other hackeyed motivational phrase.
After stocking up on enough of these and never making it past the mid-way mark, I’ve finally come to a delayed conclusion that I simply don’t like checklists.
But, that doesn’t make me a failure.
Nor does it for you. As a collective, I think we all should give ourselves a bit more credit.
After all, we’ve all mastered the art of the routine in one shape or another. We wake up at the same time each morning. Dress ourselves. Commute to our jobs. Heat the coffee. Check emails. Then rinse and for the next five days. And most of us haven’t broken out out our schedules since our first days of preschool.
Our entire world runs on routine. Is it any wonder, that we can’t bear to stick to it a second longer when we finally get a moment of freedom?
I think I speak for us all when I say…to hell with the routine!
Call it them monotony of a 9-5 finally beginning to set in, or a quarter-life crisis. Regardless, I have had it with productivity tips that command us to work harder and put us on a journey to chasing endless self-provement, as though we are nothing less than a fraction from being perfectly human.
I think it’s past time to re-define the routine.
Contrary to popular belief, I don’t believe routine is something that we should force ourselves into every single day. What kind of life, could we ever truly live being bound by routine? That would be a limited existence. Rather than restricting ourselves into checkboxes,. dates and numbers. we should instead consider….what we can we achieve in a day that will truly help us reset?
I’ve realized that ironically the things I find myself doing routinely now didn’t come to pass by purposely being approached as routines to me. They are activities that I like forward to doing, because I feel better when I do them.
Rather than cursing myself for snoozing my alarm and wanting to sleep in a bit longer, I instead, approach waking up earlier as a relaxing experience to look forward to in the morning. Similar to the Pavlov’s dog experiement, I’ve applied positive reinforcement – by taking note of all of the things I’ll get to gain by waking up earlier, rather than focusing on the adverse consequences of departing the warmth of my bed, and shaming myself for burying myself beneath the duvet for a few seconds longer.
When I don’t mute my alarm, this means I get a bit more me time, before the Slacks and emails inevitably pile in. I get to get into a warm steamy shower and scrub the dirt off my face with the soft bristles of my face scrubber. I get to put refreshing under-eye patches on my skin, to chase away the lingering doses of sleep. I get to quench my hunger pains with a delicious egg omelette, and sizzling bacon, paired with a perfectly creamed cup of coffee. When I focus on all of these pleasurable activities, I’m filled with excitement and a thrill to get right to it.
And, we can approach all of the other “routine” tasks we want to integrate in a similar fashion!
Take, weekend chores as another example.
It’s hard to muster up the energy to clean your room or do the laundry when you’re telling yourself you should do it, and the mess appears to grow with every insulting “messy” or “lazy” you a add to the pile. But, if you can shift the language and focus more on the way you feel when your surroundings are tidy, it can make all the difference. There have been more than enough studies published to show that when you’re in a clean environment, it can have a positive impact on your mood and mental wellbeing, because less clutter, ultimately produces a more harmononous mental state. And you can make the experience more appealing to your senses by listening to feel-good music, or adding fragrance with candles or essential oils.
When we reframe the acts that we want to create routines out of, as pleasurable, it will take them from tasks we feel compelled to do, to rituals we actual enjoy – which will ultimately become natural for us to integrate. It’s time we free ourselves from the shackles of “shoulds” and fill each new day with exciting experiences we’re ready to receive with gratitude.